ACT does not demand that people think differently
CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) is a widely used talking therapy that helps people notice and question their thoughts. It often asks people to think about ideas like, “I am bad at social situations,” and to check if these thoughts are true. This can be helpful when the thought is not based on real life or is not accurate. However, for autistic people, worries like this can come from real experiences, not from getting things wrong.
For example: ‘The lights are very bright and hurting my eyes. I’m struggling to think clearly and finding it hard to have conversations. I don’t know how to tell people this. I want to leave’
Because of this, autistic people may need more than just being asked to challenge the thought. They may need help to see when their anxiety makes sense and comes from real experiences, and when it does not. They may also need support to make changes, like asking for quieter spaces, clearer communication, or taking breaks. They may need strategies to help them cope when their anxiety does not make sense, and different strategies to use when their anxiety is justified. This can help them decide when to change their surroundings, speak up for their needs, or question a thought that may not be accurate.
ACT uses acceptance, not argument.
Why this helps:
- It does not make people feel like their real experiences are being dismissed or called “wrong
- It helps reduce the stress and tiredness that comes from always doubting yourself
- It recognises that anxiety often has clear and understandable reasons
For example, when a person feels anxious in social situations, ACT says it is OK that these situations are hard and does not ask them to pretend otherwise. It focuses on what the person wants and how to help them cope. It also helps them work out what they need to accept and what they can try to change.
ACT supports differences in how people feel, think, and experience the world
ACT can help people to accept and manage:
- sensory overwhelm (when things feel too bright, loud, or busy)
- shutdowns and meltdowns
- tiredness from masking (hiding how you really feel)
- a need for routine and knowing what will happen
- deep focus, and finding it hard to switch attention
Instead of pushing people to put up with more, ACT helps them:
- notice early signs of feeling overwhelmed
- choose helpful actions (for example, leaving a noisy place)
- be kind to themselves, instead of judging themselves
This helps people feel more in control, rather than feeling they must avoid everything.
It reduces the “struggle with the struggle”
Autistic anxiety is often made worse by:
- trying to hide stress
- feeling ashamed of needs
- masking emotions
- fearing that others will judge reactions
ACT teaches:
- it’s OK to feel anxious
- feelings rise, peak, and fall
- you can still take some meaningful actions even when you are anxious
This decreases the secondary anxiety about “having anxiety”.
ACT helps with rigid thinking without forcing ‘positive thinking’
Autistic people sometimes experience:
- all‑or‑nothing thinking (seeing things as only one way or the other)
- strong rules and expectations
- finding it hard when plans change
ACT gently helps people become more flexible in how they think by:
- stepping back from their thoughts and noticing them, rather than getting stuck in them
- focusing on what is happening right now (this is sometimes called grounding)
- noticing there may be other ways to see things, without feeling pushed or judged
It is not about saying “your thought is wrong”.
It’s about saying:
“This is a thought. You get to decide how much power it has.”
Values work fits well with autistic identity
Autistic people often have strong, stable values, such as:
- fairness
- honesty
- autonomy
- competence
- loyalty
- deep interests
ACT helps people use these values as anchors when anxiety spikes.
Example:
If a value is “helping others”, a person might choose to attend a community event not because they must, but because it aligns with what matters to them.
You don’t have to see a therapist to try ACT strategies.
There are books and websites that can help you learn the strategies for yourself.
Further reading – click the links to find out more:
For more information about ACT
- watch this video:
www.actmindfully.com.au/free-stuff/free-videos/ - Read ‘The Happiness Trap’ by Russ Harris
Strategies to support with anxiety, including ACT:
Autism and anxiety:
www.leicspart.nhs.uk/autism-space/emotional-wellbeing/understanding-anxiety-in-autistic-people/
For a directory of resources and support services for emergency, urgent and non-urgent emotional health support, including those relevant to support around bereavement, please click the following link:
www.leicspart.nhs.uk/autism-space/health-wellbeing-resources/emotional-health/
Key points
- Values reduce the feeling of being lost in anxiety and give a sense of direction.
- Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) can help autistic people feel less stressed and anxious, without asking them to deny what they really experience.
- ACT does not tell people to argue with their thoughts. Instead, it accepts that many worries are based on real sensory, social or thinking differences.
- The approach works well with common autistic experiences such as sensory overload, shutdowns, meltdowns, feeling worn out from masking, and needing predictability.
- ACT helps people feel less ashamed about anxiety by showing that it is OK to feel anxious and that feelings come and go.
- It supports flexible thinking in a gentle way, without forcing “positive thinking” or saying thoughts are wrong.
- ACT uses personal values (like fairness, honesty or helping others) to guide choices, helping people do what matters to them even when anxiety is present.
- You can practise ACT without a therapist